It was a beautiful day in West Palm Beach, Florida. The people were shopping. The people were playing. The people were wreaking havoc with each other's hilarious putty. The people were buying vanilla ice cream to cool off, since it was late July. Nothing could have been any better.
There lived a valiant man whose name was Todysseus. Todysseus was known as Toad to most people. He spoke with a dominant Southern accent and could easily excel at the trumpet, for he was a member of the local jazz ensemble. Toad was a good man. He was saved when he was baptized.
The Fateful Day
On July 30th, something happened that no one could expect. The wind grew stronger by the minute. Raindrops kept falling on people's heads. Those same raindrops came down harder and harder. They knocked out many of the people's goofy putty in the city. Buffoonish putty spurted everywhere because of the hard raindrops. West Palm Beach was already a mess.
Toad viewed the mess as he and his sidekick, Froggidelius, roamed the sticky streets.
"Nothing could get worse than this," Toad said to himself.
"I concur," Froggidelius replied.
Ironically, the situation got much worse. The hard raindrops were not enough. The next day, there was a huge tide that came from the Atlantic Ocean with the hard raindrops. The Huge Wind of Patrice blew over the sticky city and made it even stickier. Buildings were covered in outlandish putty. Business people ran out of their buildings yelling for help. Many people were either sticky, wet, or all of the above.
The Plan of Action
It was a true hurricane. The city was flooded, as well as buildings, homes, and ice cream parlors being damaged due to the wacky putty. Toad and Froggy, as most people called them, scratched their heads in contemplation. They both drew thousands and thousands of sketches of ways to save the beloved West Palm Beach.
The 1,117th sketch was the perfect sketch that Toad himself drew. The plan was to save up trillions of cans of baked beans and throw them at Patrice, the villain. The simple diversion was just to use the trillions of cans of baked beans, a massive slingshot, and to be sure that they were both safe.
Patrice was in her lair below the undercurrent of the Atlantic Ocean. She chuckled, cackled, clucked, gloated, and laughed at all the evil she inflicted upon the people of West Palm Beach.
"I am evil! I am so nasty! Ha ha ha!" she laughed to herself before she could pull one of her strings. "Now....all I have to do is defeat Todysseus, and West Palm Beach is mine!"
She started her obnoxious bout of laughter once again.
Now Patrice hated baked beans. That was the whole point of Toad's diversion. Baked beans made her very gassy. If she even smelled a baked bean, society was sure to at least hear her live performance of her favorite tunes. Then, afterwards, everyone would applaud. This "everyone" referred to her evil cronies.
Another Fateful Day
Today was the day. Today was the fateful day. Today was the day that Toad and Froggy were going to at least attempt to defeat Patrice. They had their Greek armour on, their trillions of cans of baked beans in hand, and their gigantic slingshot, trademarked by ACNE.
Toad and Froggy approached the entrance to Patrice's lair, and Toad yelled at the top of his lungs, "COME OUT OF YOUR LAIR AND FIGHT!"
Patrice did just that. She tried to throw spurts of water at both Toad's and Froggy's faces. The two good men threw baked beans at Patrice. Patrice grew sillier and sillier by the minute. There was a brief music performance.
The fighting continued for forty days and forty nights, with no one getting exhausted. Toad and Froggy were wetter and wetter. Patrice was sillier and sillier. She still threw the spurts of water at Toad and Froggy, who, in return, continued to throw baked beans at Patrice. For the first time in forty days and forty nights, the words came out of Patrice's mouth.
"Surrender or eat pie."
Toad and Froggy looked at each other and simultaneously said, "We don't feel like eating pie."
Patrice said furiously, "Then, surrender."
Toad and Froggy shrugged their shoulders and ate the rest of the baked beans in misery. West Palm Beach was destroyed until some really good people helped reconstruct it. Meanwhile, Toad and Froggy moved to Wyoming, where the least amount of people resided.
Moral of the Story
Baked beans are used for nutrition, not music.
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